My daughter is an extrovert-to-the-power-of-1o. At 18 months old, I realized she could not have a day at home and be happy.
If I did not put that child in the car seat and drive her somewhere every single day she would end up a screaming mess of frustrated babyhood and I would have a mom meltdown.
Now, I’m pretty sure she goes through withdrawals the first week of summer vacation because she must see friends every day and if she’s not seeing them in person, could she please call one of them on the phone?
I, on the other hand, like home-time, family-time, quiet-time, me-time, creative-time, thinking-time, and I hate the telephone. I pretty much disintegrate emotionally if I’m out of my house too long more than two days in a row.
But God made me her mom, so we’re in this together and maybe we’re both better because of it.
5 things This Introvert is Teaching My Extroverted Daughter:
1. Be comfortable with who you are when no one is around: If you’re uncomfortable with yourself when you’re on your own and it’s quiet, then something’s wrong. You need to know who you are and like who you are even in the silence.
2. Family comes first: Sure, it’s exciting to go to your friend’s house, swim in their pool, tag along when they go to day trips and play with their toys and eat their food. But family always comes first. It’s too easy to be nicer to those outside your home than it is to be kind to those you live with every single day all up close and personal. Don’t take family for granted and don’t treat them worse than you treat your friends or even strangers.
3. Sometimes it’s better to think about what you’re going to say before you say it: Pause. Think. Then Speak.
4. Quiet is not the enemy and boredom is just fuel for creativity: If you’ve squeezed out all opportunities for quiet, rest, and unscheduled time, then you’ve squeezed out time with God and time for God to speak to you.
5. It’s okay to say “no”: You don’t have to answer the phone every time it rings. You don’t have to do everything you’re asked to do or go everywhere you’re asked to go. Sometimes saying “no” is the healthiest and wisest thing you can say.
5 Things My Extroverted Daughter is Teaching Me:
1. People matter more than to-do lists and tasks. It’s okay to leave the to-do list tomorrow and spend time watching a movie or sitting with someone, playing a game, or just talking.
2. Ministry always means loving people. It’s not possible to be a vessel fit for God’s service if I fail to love people. Being an introvert is not an excuse for being self-focused or for acting like the world is all about ‘me’. Ministry requires compassion, unselfishness, kindness, generosity with time and resources, and absolutely requires loving others—whether you’re an introvert or not.
3. Most things really are better with a friend. Sharing experiences with others opens you up to new perspectives and ideas.
4. If you’re always worried about what people think, you miss out on a lot of fun. Sometimes you just have to risk it and put yourself out there, even when it’s uncomfortable or unexpected or unknown. Be silly. Have fun. Do something new even if you won’t be great at it. Learn to laugh at yourself.
5. A room full of new people is just a room full of potential new friends. So don’t be afraid; just enjoy the adventure!
Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him (Psalm 127:3 NLT)
Heather King is a wife, mom, Bible Study teacher, writer and worship leader. Most importantly, she is a Christ follower with a desire to help others apply the Bible to everyday life with all its mess, noise, and busyness. Her book, Ask Me Anything, Lord: Opening Our Hearts to God’s Questions, is available now! To read more devotionals by Heather King, click here.
Copyright © 2014 Heather King
4 thoughts on “5 Things This Introvert is Teaching My Extroverted Daughter (and 5 things maybe she’s teaching me)”
Hi, Heather! I’m looking forward to meeting you in our platform building group with Ruth. I can truly relate to this post – I’m an introvert, too! Blessings from one hectic household to another!
How exciting to know we’ll be meeting together face-to-face in such a short time!
I have an extroverted daughter too, and I understand every word you just wrote. She’s 11 now, and literally getting calls from friends who want to get together while she’s out with other friends. Day after day. I’m going crazy just trying to keep up with her social schedule, and she’s asking for sleepovers three times a week.
Nervous breakdown before the end of July, anyone?
We’ll need a vacation from our summer vacation 🙂