Book Review | 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage

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9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage
by Sheila Wray Gregoire

Sheila Wray Gregoire’s new book, 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage, accomplishes something quite difficult: Saying something fresh about marriage.  After reading and/or reviewing so many marriage books that focus on male/female communication and seeing the world as either pink or blue and offer cute little catchphrases, I loved how Gregoire dug a bit deeper.  She tackles commonly held cliches or superficial Christian marriage beliefs and replaces them with 9 thoughts that could change the way you think about what it means to love your 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriagehusband.

Her first thought sounds so simple: “My Husband is My Neighbor.”  But in that one simple thought, she addresses an attitude adjustment that we need to make as wives.  She writes, “it’s often easier to feel compassion for people in the abstract than for individuals we know up close and personal” (16) and also, “I have this sneaking suspicion that most of us save our best behavior for those whom we barely know and show our worst side to those we know the best” (17).  Isn’t that so true?  We often display grace, forgiveness, and compassion for those outside of our home, strangers even who we meet at the grocery story or the bank, but then snap at every flaw we see in the one person we are to treasure the most.

Her other thoughts are just as important, valuable, and challenging, including “My Husband Can’t Make Me Mad,” My Husband Was Not Put on This Earth to Make Me Happy” and (my favorite), “I”m Called to Be a Peacemaker, not a Peacekeeper.”  In this last chapter, she argues that “pursuing peace does not mean seeking an absence of conflict.”  Instead, God’s heart is for oneness, and sometimes that means choosing to work together to fix differences instead of simply ignoring them in an effort to “keep the peace.”

Gregoire manages to maintain a very difficult balance.  Submission and respecting our husbands does not mean allowing them to do whatever they feel like it, no matter how abusive, harmful, irresponsible, and hurtful.  Her question is, “If you step back and ‘submit,’ are you being a ‘suitable helper’ to him? Or are you enabling him?”  Nor does establishing boundaries in marriage mean threatening divorce or harping on his every flaw and failing.  She suggests that holiness in marriage results from lovingly helping each become more Christ-like, loving each other enough to speak truth in love when necessary.

Throughout each chapter, Gregoire includes Action Steps and then she includes a summary of all of the action steps at the end of the chapter so they are easy to find and implement.  You may not be able to do each action step in a chapter, but with several choices, there is usually something you can put into practice.  Some action steps involve your husband and some you can do on your own, like “Pray about where God is leading your husband. Ask God, ‘How can I tangibly support my husband in that?’

She also provides a helpful appendix with her favorite marriage resources in various categories, such as: Make Your Marriage Great, The Purpose of Marriage, Sex, Handling Conflict and Setting Boundaries, and Roles in Marriage.  I loved this resource list because it’s likely that as you read her book, you’d identify the weaker aspects of your marriage and then find further information and encouragement on those specific areas.

Ultimately, this is a marriage book for an engaged woman, the newly married, the seasoned wife with a great marriage and the woman in a marriage that is struggling.  While not every one of her thoughts will fit your own marriage needs, there are most likely at least some healthy reminders or fresh encouragements to help any wife make her marriage better.

I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Disclaimer:   Heather King is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com

Book Review | Brave Enough

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Brave Enough
by Nicole Unice

In Brave Enough, Nicole Unice tells us a little secret: “We’re all a little scared.” Being afraid, though, doesn’t mean you can’t live with courage.  It doesn’t mean you can’t be brave.  She writes, “Courage is the will to move past fear and get out of our own way, to become the women God has made us to be.”  Being Brave-Enough isn’t about climbing mountains or skydiving; it’s about living in obedience to God even when that makes you shake in your sneakers.Brave Enough

Nicole has such a fresh, get-real style to her writing, and I love it.  She’s never putting on a facade and she doesn’t hold back from confessing some of her own struggles (like setting limits and boundaries on her schedule).  As a Christian counselor, her emphasis is often on the counseling, psychological, emotional aspects of our life–why do we do what we do and how can we submit that to Christ?  I tend to prefer more Bible-study focus and less Christian-counseling-focus in the books I read, but that isn’t true for everyone, and Nicole Unice’s insights and expertise really shine and will be an encouragement and help to lots of women.

This book includes nine chapters, each focusing on an area where we can be brave in our Christian walk, such as “Brave-Enough Women Love Grace, Brave-Enough Women Give Grace, Brave-Enough Women Know Their Limits” and more.  She includes action points that she calls “Our Daily Brave” at the end of each chapter, as well as a prayer.

Both in her book, She’s Got Issues, and in this book, Brave Enough, Nicole Unice gets real about anger in a way that I haven’t really seen in most other books for Christian women.  I also liked her discussion of ‘fake grace’ in this book, when she talks about how women deal with failure sometimes by making excuses or concessions instead of just resting in the lavish grace of Christ. She challenges the reader by saying, “When we manufacture weak, fake grace, we end up being weak, fake people.”

Ultimately, Nicole is really writing about how we can bravely engage in sanctification and how God transforms us to be more like Christ every single day.  We sometimes get caught up and terrified of ‘big changes’ and huge spiritual moments, and “it might be easier to think of the ways we can save the world than ways we can change our daily life….Bravely facing the hard places in our heart and desiring to receive and give real grace takes grit” (87).  This book is about being Brave Enough to let God work in our heart and our lives every single day without holding back.

I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Disclaimer:   Heather King is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com

25 Bible Verses and a Prayer for Rest

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versesrest.jpg

 

Well, friends, our family pushed through the month of July with all of its busyness and made it to the other side.  To August.  And to rest.

And we’re ready for rest.

I’ll be taking some time to relax with my family, to regroup and refresh.  Here are 25 verses and a prayer for rest to share with you while I’m away.

Be Back Soon!

heather signature

 

 

  • Genesis 2:2-3 ESV
    And on the seventh day God finished his work that he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all his work that he had done.  So God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it God rested from all his work that he had done in creation.
  • Exodus 20:8-10 NIV
     “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.  Six days you shall labor and do all your work,  but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns.
  • Exodus 23:12 ESV
    “Six days you shall do your work, but on the seventh day you shall rest; that your ox and your donkey may have rest, and the son of your servant woman, and the alien, may be refreshed.
  • Exodus 33:14 ESV
    And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
  • Deuteronomy 5:12-15 ESV
     “‘Observe the Sabbath day, to keep it holy, as the Lord your God commanded you. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, you or your son or your daughter or your male servant or your female servant, or your ox or your donkey or any of your livestock, or the sojourner who is within your gates, that your male servant and your female servant may rest as well as you.  You shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt, and the Lord your God brought you out from there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. Therefore the Lord your God commanded you to keep the Sabbath day.
  • Psalm 4:8 ESV
    In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
        for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.
  • Psalm 23:1-2 ESV
    The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
    He makes me lie down in green pastures.
    He leads me beside still waters.
  • Psalm 62:1-2 ESV
    For God alone my soul waits in silence;
        from him comes my salvation.
    He alone is my rock and my salvation,
        my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken.
  • Psalm 62:5 NIV
    Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
        my hope comes from him.
  • Psalm 116:7 NIV
    Return to your rest, my soul,
        for the Lord has been good to you.
  • Psalm 127:2 ESV
    It is in vain that you rise up early
        and go late to rest,
    eating the bread of anxious toil;
        for he gives to his beloved sleep.
  • Psalm 131:2 NIV
    But I have calmed and quieted myself,
        I am like a weaned child with its mother;
        like a weaned child I am content.
  • Proverbs 19:23 NIV
    The fear of the Lord leads to life;
        then one rests content, untouched by trouble.
  • Isaiah 26:3 ESV
    You keep him in perfect peace
        whose mind is stayed on you,
        because he trusts in you.
  • Isaiah 30:15 NIV
    This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says:
    “In repentance and rest is your salvation
    in quietness and trust is your strength
    but you would have none of it.
  • Isaiah 40:28-31 ESV
    Have you not known? Have you not heard?prayerrest
    The Lord is the everlasting God,
        the Creator of the ends of the earth.
    He does not faint or grow weary;
        his understanding is unsearchable.
     He gives power to the faint,
        and to him who has no might he increases strength.
     Even youths shall faint and be weary,
        and young men shall fall exhausted;
     but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
        they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
    they shall run and not be weary;
        they shall walk and not faint.
  • Jeremiah 6:16 ESV
    Thus says the Lord:
    “Stand by the roads, and look,
        and ask for the ancient paths,
    where the good way is; and walk in it,
        and find rest for your souls.
    But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’
  • Ezekiel 20:12 ESV
    Moreover, I gave them my Sabbaths, as a sign between me and them, that they might know that I am the Lord who sanctifies them.
  • Matthew 11:28-30 ESV
    Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
  • Matthew 12:12 ESV
    Of how much more value is a man than a sheep! So it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath.”
  • Mark 2:27 ESV
    And he said to them, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.
  • Mark 6:31 ESV
     And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat.
  • Colossians 2:16-17 ESV
     Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. 17 These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ
  • Hebrews 4:9-11 ESV
    So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God, 10 for whoever has entered God’s rest has also rested from his works as God did from his.  Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience.
  • 1 John 3:19-20 NIV
    This is how we know that we belong to the truth and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence:20 If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.

Hope has a Name

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Matthew 12

I froze on the sidewalk in the scorching summer heat with a six-year-old by my side and a toddler in the stroller.

We had popped into a grocery story 45 minutes from our home on a whim and then just as spontaneously decided to walk down to the Subway for lunch.

Nothing about this day was planned out or scheduled.  We could have just as easily been anywhere else at that moment.

But it was in that moment and there in that place that a stranger flew out of the doors of one of the storefronts, cigarette and phone in her hand, screaming at the air.

When she collapsed to the ground and cried so hard she almost stopped breathing, I rushed over, stooped down, placed my hands on her back and asked her what was wrong.

“My son is dead.”

That’s what she shouted.

It took time to sort through the mess of it all, how she was still on the phone and her younger son had just delivered the news that her 19-year-old boy had been killed in a car wreck.

I sat with her while others emerged. People poured out onto the sidewalk wondering about the commotion.

Pain like that can’t be contained and hushed up, quietly hidden away so as not to disturb anyone.  Pain like that is what makes us reach out to other when they collapse under the weight of their own trauma.

An older couple who had been out shopping stopped and whispered the sad truth, “We lost a son that same way.  We know what you’re going through.”

Store managers took charge of the practicalities, bringing her water, calling her boyfriend, covering her shift at work, calling emergency services to take her home.

Then a young man walked down pushing his own infant son in a stroller.  He cradled her face in his hands and told her to give it to God.

He shared his own hurt, how his oldest son was in a coma about 8 hours away after a car accident four months ago.  “What else can I do but just keep going and give it to God?”

We were eye-witnesses and onlookers to the worst moment of her life.

My son squirmed in the stroller and reached out for me, not sure what to make of the scene.  My daughter quietly looked on, staring wide-eyed at the stranger crying right there on the pavement.

I reached out to reassure them and then asked if I could pray for her, and we brought the ugliness and the pain straight to Jesus.

This woman I didn’t know looked up at me with eyes that held no hope.

We can mosey about life thinking we’re doing okay or at least we’re pushing through, but when you’re knocked down onto the sidewalk, that’s what reveals the truth about us and the hope we’ve been clinging to.

This world constantly mistakes hope for wishful thinking, anyway, and we toss around “hope” like it’s little more than a catchphrase or polite conversation.

I hope you get that job.

I hope you have a good day.

I hope it all works out for ya.

I hope you get better soon.

But as Christians, we don’t have wishful-thinking-hope.  We don’t have positive-thoughts-hope.

Hope has a name and that name is Jesus.

And his name will be the hope
    of all the world (Matthew 12:21 NLT).

Jesus gives us confident-assurance-hope.  Because of Him, we have rock-solid-hope that God is with us and that God will save us and that God won’t abandon us.

In her book, Brave Enough, Nicole Unice writes about the word “tharseo” in Scripture, how it’s used four places in the Gospels and each time it’s spoken by Jesus Himself.

To a paralyzed man lowered down to Jesus by four friends who scaled a roof and took it apart in order to help their friend:  “Take heart, my son;your sins are forgiven” (Matthew 9:2 ESV).

To the woman who had been bleeding for 12 years: “Jesus turned, and seeing her he said, “Take heart, daughter; your faith has made you well” (Matthew 9:22 ESV).

To the disciples alone in the boat out on a storm-tossed sea: “But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid” (Matthew 14:27 ESV).

To the disciples…and to us….”I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33 ESV).

Nicole Unice says this word means:

“Tharseo: Courage.
Jesus is near!
Forgiven sin.
Healed lives.
Powerful presence.”

Take Heart.

It’s Jesus we need.  It’s in His presence we find courage, forgiveness, healing, and yes, we find the Hope we’ve been looking for.

Heather King is a wife, mom, Bible Study teacher, writer and worship leader.  Most importantly, she is a Christ follower with a desire to help others apply the Bible to everyday life with all its mess, noise, and busyness.  Her book, Ask Me Anything, Lord: Opening Our Hearts to God’s Questions, is available now!  To read more devotionals by Heather King, click here.

Copyright © 2015 Heather King

The Prayers of a Stranger

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Psalm 37

That moment that someone you don’t know rests her hands on your back and leans down to pray for you, your soul feels a little laid bare.

How will they know what to pray?

They haven’t peered into the hidden corners of your heart.

They haven’t watched you toss from side to side in the middle of the night or read through your prayer journal.

They don’t know you.

But God does.

I sat in a chair two weeks ago with some beautiful, Jesus-following, God-passionate women surrounding me in prayer.

That’s when she started talking to God about me as if she knew everything weighing on my mind.

I’d been praying intensely for months.  I do it every year, really, spending the summer in focused prayer about my fall commitments.

I seek God about what groups to join, where to step down, what ministries to let go of, what ministries to invest in, and what we, as a family, should be doing.

I lay my calendar out at His feet and give Him sovereign control over it.

But this year, I was praying and getting nowhere.

I kept telling God the same thing, “I’ll do whatever You want me to do, but just tell me what it is!!!  Please!!!”

The thing about decisions is that there are usually deadlines.  And there are other people waiting to find out what you decide.

Oh, the pressure!

But I still hadn’t heard that clear, neon-sign direction from God, and His silence was stressing me out.  Big time.

Then this woman I didn’t know prayed for me.  She said, “Dear Lord, please don’t let her struggle or fret over what to do anymore.  Help her to know that You are pleased with what she does and You are with her.”

That prayer set me free.

She didn’t know me.  She didn’t take prayer requests before she bowed her head by my side.  She simply prayed and God used her prayer to break through my noisy, cluttered, confused mind with one clear question:

What do you want to do?

What do I want to do?  I told Him the truth—I’d do anything He asked me to do even if I felt overwhelmed by the possibilities or even if it’s not what I would do on my own.

He asked me again.

Heather, what do you want to do?

I fumbled a bit, feeling sheepish to say it as if it made me less spiritual to want anything: “Well, Lord, if I’m being honest, and I had the freedom to do anything at all, this is what I would want to do.”

Two days later, He gave me everything I wanted.  With all of the sovereignty and power of our Sovereign, Powerful God, He had moved every piece into line the moment I got honest with Him.

Sometimes we’re selfish beings. We want to use God like a divine Santa Clause or a prayer vending machine.

But when our hearts are truly seeking His face and our lives are deeply committed to obedience despite the cost, God can do this:

Delight yourself in the Lord,
    and he will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 36:4 ESV).

It begins by delighting in Him, not in our own selfishness or greed.  But it also means knowing how to answer when He asks, “What do you want?”

It means trusting His love for us enough to be honest with Him.

Caleb asked his daughter Achsah this after she married.

“What do you want?” 15 She said to him, “Give me a blessing. Since you have set me in the land of the Negeb, give me also springs of water.” And Caleb gave her the upper springs and the lower springs (Judges 1:14-15 ESV).

She knew what she wanted.  More than that, she knew what she needed.  In that desert land, she needed the water from the springs in order to thrive or even survive.

She also knew she was the beloved daughter of a caring father who didn’t just give her one set of springs when she asked, but gave her so much more.

And you and I, that’s what we are, beloved children of a caring Father.

Margaret Feinberg writes:

He knows what you need and stands ready to hear from you. God is asking, ‘What do you want?’ Will you get off your donkey and ask boldly for what you need to survive?’ (Fight Back With Joy).

It could be in His sovereignty and wisdom, He’ll tell you ‘no.’  And, it may sting at first, but the sting will fade with time and grace remains.

But maybe, just maybe, He’ll say ‘yes.’

Maybe, just maybe, He was waiting on you all along, wanting you to bring your requests to Him and ask.  Simply ask.

Heather King is a wife, mom, Bible Study teacher, writer and worship leader.  Most importantly, she is a Christ follower with a desire to help others apply the Bible to everyday life with all its mess, noise, and busyness.  Her book, Ask Me Anything, Lord: Opening Our Hearts to God’s Questions, is available now!  To read more devotionals by Heather King, click here.

Book Review | The Miracle in the Middle

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The Miracle in the Middle
by Charlotte Gambill

Waiting. No one is a big fan of waiting, and we talk a great deal in Christian circles about how difficult it is to wait on God.  In her book, The Miracle in the Middle, Charlotte Gambill writes about this season of waiting as being “in the middle.”  You’ve moved beyond the excitement of an initial calling or hearing from God, but you haven’t reached the season of harvest and blessing.  You’re stuck in the middle, just trying to keep moving forward without giving up.miracle-in-the-middle

Over the eleven chapters in this book, Gambill encourages the reader to drop anchor (cling to hope), listen for God’s voice in the void, be prepared to handle the strain, re-check priorities, maintain the vision and more.  I found that it took me a while to really get into the book, but at about halfway, I started underlining and turning down the corners of pages.  For some reason, the second half of the book made more of an impact on me, so it’s a book that is worth the full read—don’t put it down after the first few chapters.

Each chapter ends with a few Action Points and Prayer Points, which work well for an individual who wants to apply the lessons, but wouldn’t really serve as content for a small group or book club discussion.

By the end of the book, Gambill encourages the reader not just to survive seasons of waiting or push through to the end, but how to actually discover the joy and the miracle in the middle.

I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Disclaimer:  Heather King is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com

50 Bible Verses on Compassion

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verses-compassion

  • Exodus 22:27b NIV
    When they cry out to me, I will hear, for I am compassionate.
  • Exodus 33:19 NIV
    And the Lord said, “I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion.
  • Exodus 34:6 NIV
     And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness
  • Deuteronomy 13:17 NIV
    and none of the condemned things are to be found in your hands. Then the Lord will turn from his fierce anger, will show you mercy, and will have compassion on you. He will increase your numbers, as he promised on oath to your ancestors—
  • Deuteronomy 30:3 NIV
    then the Lord your God will restore your fortunes and have compassion on you and gather you again from all the nations where he scattered you.
  • 2 Kings 13:23 NIV
    But the Lord was gracious to them and had compassion and showed concern for them because of his covenant with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. To this day he has been unwilling to destroy them or banish them from his presence.
  • 2 Chronicles 30:9 NIV
    If you return to the Lord, then your fellow Israelites and your children will be shown compassion by their captors and will return to this land, for the Lord your God is gracious and compassionate. He will not turn his face from you if you return to him.”
  • Nehemiah 9:17 NIV
     They refused to listen and failed to remember the miracles you performed among them. They became stiff-necked and in their rebellion appointed a leader in order to return to their slavery. But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. Therefore you did not desert them,
  • Nehemiah 9:19 NIV
    Because of your great compassion you did not abandon them in the wilderness. By day the pillar of cloud did not fail to guide them on their path, nor the pillar of fire by night to shine on the way they were to take
  • Psalm 51:1 NIV
  • Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
  • Psalm 86:15 NIV
    But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.
  • Psalm 90:13 NIV
    Relent, Lord! How long will it be?
        Have compassion on your servants.
  • Psalm 102:13 NIV
    You will arise and have compassion on Zion,
        for it is time to show favor to her;
        the appointed time has come.
  • Psalm 103:4 NIV
    who redeems your life from the pit
        and crowns you with love and compassion
  • Psalm 103:8 NIV
    The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
        slow to anger, abounding in love
  • Psalm 103:13 NIV
    As a father has compassion on his children,
        so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
  • Psalm 111:4 NIV
    He has caused his wonders to be remembered;
        the Lord is gracious and compassionate.
  • Psalm 112:4 NIV
    Even in darkness light dawns for the upright,
        for those who are gracious and compassionate and righteous.
  • Psalm 116:5 NIV
    The Lord is gracious and righteous;
        our God is full of compassion.
  • Psalm 119:77 NIV
    Let your compassion come to me that I may live,
        for your law is my delight.
  • Psalm 119:156 NIV
    Your compassion, Lord, is great;
        preserve my life according to your laws.
  • Psalm 135:14 NIV
    For the Lord will vindicate his people
        and have compassion on his servants.
  • Psalm 145:8-9 NIV
    The Lord is gracious and compassionate,
        slow to anger and rich in love.
    9 The Lord is good to all;
        he has compassion on all he has made.
  • Isaiah 14:1 NIV
    The Lord will have compassion on Jacob;
        once again he will choose Israel
        and will settle them in their own land.
    Foreigners will join them
        and unite with the descendants of Jacob.
  • Isaiah 30:18 NIV
    Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you;
        therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.
    For the Lord is a God of justice.
        Blessed are all who wait for him!
  • Isaiah 49:10 NIV
    They will neither hunger nor thirst,
        nor will the desert heat or the sun beat down on them.
    He who has compassion on them will guide them
        and lead them beside springs of water.
  • Isaiah 49:13 NIV
    Shout for joy, you heavens;
        rejoice, you earth;
        burst into song, you mountains!
    For the Lord comforts his people
        and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.
  • Isaiah 49:15 NIV
    “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
        and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
    Though she may forget,
        I will not forget you!
  • Isaiah 51:3 NIV
    The Lord will surely comfort Zion
        and will look with compassion on all her ruins;
    he will make her deserts like Eden,
        her wastelands like the garden of the Lord.
    Joy and gladness will be found in her,
        thanksgiving and the sound of singing.
  • Isaiah 54:7-10 NIV
    “For a brief moment I abandoned you,
        but with deep compassion I will bring you back.
    8 In a surge of anger
        I hid my face from you for a moment,
    but with everlasting kindness
        I will have compassion on you,”
        says the Lord your Redeemer.
    9 “To me this is like the days of Noah,
        when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth.
    So now I have sworn not to be angry with you,
        never to rebuke you again./
    10 Though the mountains be shaken
        and the hills be removed,
    yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
        nor my covenant of peace be removed,”
        says the Lord, who has compassion on you.
  • Isaiah 60:10 NIV
    “Foreigners will rebuild your walls,
        and their kings will serve you.
    Though in anger I struck you,
        in favor I will show you compassion.
  • Isaiah 63:7 NIV
    I will tell of the kindnesses of the Lord, the deeds for which he is to be praised, according to all the Lord has done for us— yes, the many good things he has done for Israel, according to hiscompassion and many kindnesses.
  • Jeremiah 12:15 NIV
    But after I uproot them, I will again have compassion and will bring each of them back to their own inheritance and their own country.
  • Jeremiah 31:20 NIV
    Is not Ephraim my dear son,
        the child in whom I delight?
    Though I often speak against him,
        I still remember him.
    Therefore my heart yearns for him;
        I have great compassion for him,”
    declares the Lord.
  • Jeremiah 42:12 NIV
    I will show you compassion so that he will have compassion on you and restore you to your land.’
  • Lamentations 3:22 NIV
    Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
        for his compassions never fail.
  • Lamentations 3:32 NIV
    Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
        so great is his unfailing love.
  • Ezekiel 39:25 NIV
    Therefore this is what the Sovereign Lord says: I will now restore the fortunes of Jacob[a] and will have compassion on all the people of Israel, and I will be zealous for my holy name.
  • Hosea 2:19 NIV
    I will betroth you to me forever;
        I will betroth you in righteousness and justice,
        in love and compassion.
  • Joel 2:13 NIV
    Rend your heart
        and not your garments.
    Return to the Lord your God,
        for he is gracious and compassionate,
    slow to anger and abounding in love,
        and he relents from sending calamity.
  • Jonah 4:2 NIV
    He prayed to the Lord, “Isn’t this what I said, Lord, when I was still at home? That is what I tried to forestall by fleeing to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity.
  • Micah 7:19 NIV
    You will again have compassion on us;
        you will tread our sins underfoot
        and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.
  • Zechariah 7:9 NIV
    This is what the Lord Almighty said: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.
  • Zechariah 10:6 NIV
    I will strengthen Judah and save the tribes of Joseph. I will restore them because I have compassion on them. They will be as though I had not rejected them, for I am the Lord their God and I will answer them.
  • Malachi 3:17 NIV
    “On the day when I act,” says the Lord Almighty, “they will be my treasured possession. I will spare them, just as a father has compassion and spares his son who serves him.
  • Matthew 9:36 ESV
    When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.
  • Matthew 14:14 ESV
    When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick.
  • Matthew 20:34 NIV
    Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him.
  • Mark 6:34 ESV
     When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things.
  • Luke 7:13-15 ESV
    And when the Lord saw her, he had compassion on her and said to her,“Do not weep.” 14 Then he came up and touched the bier, and the bearers stood still. And he said, “Young man, I say to you, arise.” 15 And the dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother.
  • Luke 15:20 NIV
    So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
  • Romans 9:15 NIV
    For he says to Moses,

    “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy,
        and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.”

  • 2 Corinthians 1:3 NIV
    Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,
  • Ephesians 4:23 NIV
    Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
  • Philippians 2:1-2 NIV
    Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.
  • Colossians 3:12-13 ESV
    Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other;as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.
  • James 5:11 NIV
    As you know, we count as blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.
  • 1 Peter 3:8 NIV
    Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble

When You’re Not The Best Mom Ever

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psalm 116.jpg

“Thanks, Mom.  You’re the best mom ever.”

It was a casual minivan conversation.  She climbed up into her seat after preschool.  I promised to make her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with strawberries and pretzels for lunch.

She bestowed on me the title of “Best Mom Ever,” clicked her seatbelt, and then asked if she could play on my Kindle.

But two days later, I am still thinking about the mercy of this.

I may be a good mom, a making-an-effort-mom, an intentional mom, an organized mom, a take-this-seriously mom….

…but I am not the “Best Mom Ever.”

I have those days.  (Don’t we all?)

I grow weary.  I snap.  I grumble over dirty dishes and toilets.  I push too hard.  I hold on to things when I need to let go.  I feel distracted or selfish.  I forget.

This girl, though, this tiny encourager in the minivan seat behind me, doesn’t give me what I deserve or merit or earn.  She overlooks the faults and failures.

That’s what mercy does.

Mercy says, “You deserve judgment, discipline, and second-class status….but I choose not to give you what you deserve.”

And this is how I’ve learned to pray.

Lord, have mercy.

That Pharisee stood all bold and confident in the synagogue, booming out those prayers.  “God, I’m so righteous.  God I’m so worthy.  I’m not like those other people, the riff-raff and the sinners.”

But that tax collector dropped his eyes low:

“God, have mercy on me, a sinner” (Luke 8:13 NIV).

Have mercy on me, Lord.

And that blind man begging by the side of the road heard that Jesus was passing by and what could he cry out?  That he deserved healing?  That somehow he had suffered long enough and had earned a miracle?

No, he screamed it out so Jesus could hear this one desperate cry over the noisy chaos of the mob:

“Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!  (Luke 18:38 NIV).

This mercy prayer is what Jesus loved, the one that caught His attention and made Him pause, turn aside, and deliver.  Lord, have mercy.

Even Daniel, this man so righteous in the Baylonian world of unrighteousness, knew he couldn’t pray because of his own merit.

We do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy (Daniel 9:18 NIV).

So I pray this also about situations for others and situations for me: Lord, have mercy on me!prayer-for-mercy

This is no manipulative mantra, no magic incantation.  It’s not the words themselves that matter.

It’s the attitude of my heart.  God delights in the humble.  He shows compassion to the needy.

And it’s right here where I recognize my utter dependence on Him that He shows His glory most clearly.

God, I know what I’ve already been given—mercy and grace, so much grace. You have been good to me.

And I know I can’t come here asking for Your help because I’ve worked this hard or because I am this good.  Not because I’ve tried to obey or because I’m righteous.  Not because I’ve spent this much time in Your Word today or got down on my knees when I prayed instead of praying with my eyes open while I’m driving.

There’s no holy act that could earn me the right to ask this….

No amount of “good” that makes me “good enough” to request Your favor or Your blessing.

And yet, I pray simply because You are merciful.

Scripture says God hears my prayers, but the answers don’t seem to come and it feels like He’s not even hearing me.

Am I being too bold?  Am I asking for too much?  Are there far more important things on His agenda?

Am I complaining too much and should I just settle for less and be grateful for what I get?  Am I too needy?  Too demanding or spoiled?

But then this.

I open up my daily Bible reading and start to run right through that Psalm for the day and at that first verse I sit stunned.  I read it over and over again:

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;
    he heard my cry for mercy.
Because he turned his ear to me,
    I will call on him as long as I live (Psalm 116:1-2 NIV).

He blows this fresh wind of mercy over me and He fills my hyperventilating lungs with His very own breath of hope and life.

I still can’t see the answer to my prayer.  I don’t see the solution or the end.

But I know this—He hears my cry for mercy.

Originally published May 21, 2014

Heather King is a wife, mom, Bible Study teacher, writer and worship leader.  Most importantly, she is a Christ follower with a desire to help others apply the Bible to everyday life with all its mess, noise, and busyness.  Her book, Ask Me Anything, Lord: Opening Our Hearts to God’s Questions, is available now!  To read more devotionals by Heather King, click here.

Copyright © 2015 Heather King

When It’s Time to Say Goodbye

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Deuteronomy 1

Playdate protocol.

That’s what I review with my daughters in the last 5 minutes before we exit our minivan and enter their friend’s home.

Do not fight with each other.

Say please and thank you.

Clean up your messes.

Do not fight with each other.

Do show respect to her mom and call her Mrs. _____ and obey what she tells you.

Do make sure you know where the bathroom is.

Do not fight with each other (I’m sensing a theme, here……)

And, when it is time to go, thank them for having you over and go.  Do not delay.  Do not whine about leaving.  Do not take 40 minutes putting on your shoes. Do not ignore my presence.  Do not invite yourself over to their house tomorrow or beg me for a sleepover.  Do not ask me when the next playdate will occur as we are actually, technically still having a playdate at this very moment.  Do not run and hide, hoping I won’t find you and take you home.  Do not pull out more toys.  Do not whisper to your friend to climb into our minivan thinking that I won’t ask her to come out.

Saying goodbye.  That’s the hardest part of playing with a friend.

Oh, I’ll tell the truth, saying goodbye is one of the hardest life-skills—period—for children and adults.

I have my own issues with leaving.  After all, I dislike change.

Dislike?  Not quite the word, exactly.

More like:  Hate, detest, abhor….change.  Yes, that’s it.

I settle right into my comfortable routine, doing what I’ve always done, ministering how I’ve always ministered.  I take God’s call and keep on trekking, day after day after day in the same direction.

Then, He tells me it’s time for something new.

Time to say goodbye, pack my tent, and head off in a new direction.  Maybe even an unknown direction or at least an unfamiliar direction.

I’m tempted to hide or beg to stay or pretend I didn’t hear God’s call.  Anything, anything at all, other than actually embrace change.

Sometimes we refuse God’s invitation to step out of the old and step into the new.

We just keep right along, working as hard as ever doing the thing we love to do.

But He has moved on.  His favor has moved on.  His blessing, His direction, His guidance, His anointing has moved on.

And, what are we doing anyway?  Trying to work in our own strength and hold things together because we just don’t want to let go?  Because it hurts too much to relinquish that control and trust God with the future?

Maybe God has asked someone else to step up into that ministry, and we’re robbing them of the blessing of obedience because we won’t step down already and get out of the way.

Goodbye. 

God gives us permission to say it at times.  We say goodbye to ministries we love and relationships we adore, to jobs we’ve enjoyed and to seasons of our life that have grown cozy and comforting.

We say goodbye not because our ministry is ending, but because it is changing.  We say goodbye because God has called us to follow Him anew.

In Acts 20, we see how Paul calls his dear friends from Ephesian church together and tells them he’s moving on to Jerusalem, and he doesn’t expect to see them again.

Of course, they’d want him to stay.  He wasn’t just moving on in ministry; He was moving away from dear friends without the advantage of Facebook and email.

Yet, God called and Paul obeyed:

And when he had said these things, he knelt down and prayed with them all. 37 And there was much weeping on the part of all; they embraced Paul and kissed him, 38 being sorrowful most of all because of the word he had spoken, that they would not see his face again. And they accompanied him to the ship (Acts 20:36-38 ESV).

I’ve been praying over my own goodbyes….the places where God is telling me to move on, to let it go and strike out into the new.

That’s when I read this command God gave to Israel:

‘You have stayed at this mountain long enough.  It is time to break camp and move on.’ (Deuteronomy 1:6-7 NLT).

Have you lingered at this mountain long enough, content to rest here and set up camp?

If God has called you to break camp and move on….pack up your tent, say your goodbyes, and go.

Don’t fret or worry over what’s behind.  Leave that in God’s hands.  He’s got it.

Just go when He calls you to go, because you want to be with Jesus, always with Jesus, never lagging behind Him, always right by His side.

Heather King is a wife, mom, Bible Study teacher, writer and worship leader.  Most importantly, she is a Christ follower with a desire to help others apply the Bible to everyday life with all its mess, noise, and busyness.  Her book, Ask Me Anything, Lord: Opening Our Hearts to God’s Questions, is available now!  To read more devotionals by Heather King, click here.

Copyright © 2015 Heather King

It’s Good to Be Queen | Book Review

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It’s Good to be Queen
by Liz Curtis Higgs

Liz Curtis Higgs is one of my favorite Bible teachers and I’m once again in love with one of her books, It’s Good to be Queen.  In this new book, she studies the Queen of Sheba and her visit to King Solomon in 1 Kings 10.  It’s such a brief portion of Scripture and yet she unpacks it line by line in her unique way, making it compelling and full of rich wisdom and Biblical truth.itsgoodtobequeen

She includes 10 chapters, each with a unique lesson the Queen of Sheba teaches us through her example:  It’s Good to be Bold, Open, Humbled, Honest, etc.  The book also includes discussion questions and a study guide for use by book clubs and small groups.   One of the fun touches she adds to the book are occasional quotes from other queens such as Queen Elizabeth.

I love Liz’s easy-to-read style, her well-researched points and her witty humor.  I wasn’t, however, particularly a fan of the intense quoting from her social media followers.  I’ll be frank, I get why quoting from social media followers works for an author.  Fans feel like they are connecting and feel excited to be quoted in the book and you get the material you need.  However, I could have read her Facebook post comments to see what everyone on Facebook had to say.  When I read the book, I’d like something a little more.

Some of the paragraphs in this book actually seem like strung together quotations, one after the other:  “Sandra says……  Kelly writes…….Laurie admits……Brittany tells us…..”   It made the writing feel more stilted than I’ve noticed in any of her books where she relied more on her own voice.  I wouldn’t even have minded an occasional comment like, “So and so wrote me….” or “This person said….” or even “hundreds of women on my Facebook page identified with this,” but four or five paragraphs in a row of nothing more than quotes from her followers grew tiresome at times.

I’m still a huge fan of Liz Curtis Higgs and I still enjoyed this book, but I wish social media wasn’t allowed to invade  an author’s style and actual book content so heavily.  What I really wanted to read were Liz’s stories, her research, her thoughts, her heart and the Holy Spirit at work through her, not a compilation of comments from her Facebook fans.

With that said, as a Bible teacher, Liz remains one of my favorites and I could skim right over what I didn’t like in order to fully enjoy everything that is wonderful about her as an author.  She brings such rich insights to the text.  I love how she examines a verse or even one particular word in several different translations.  Even if you’ve read a story a hundred times, she can bring fresh perspective, just as she does in this book, It’s Good to be Queen.

I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Disclaimer:   Heather King is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com